of hurried eating everyone has their important thing
to get done       to get seen accomplishing
 
Nothing like a sea of black squares at 6am
with which you’re supposed to “engage”         Just start licking the screen
 
Hello hello you’re not listening         a woman tells her phone
three times as she walks past me
Some very hoarse man yelling torn whatevers
 
cherries, blueberries, red currant berries         wheat for weapons
Whoever controls X controls access to three continents
 
Under my miniscule sadness making lists about Melanie
my illusion broke       that I could separate
 
my life from my body    a domain of imagination
rather than sweating    joy that blows me out like a lightbulb
 
Rats: we will eat the engine wires and destroy your machines
If all the walls were removed they would still walk the same routes
along the places where the walls were
 
Largely the first female physicist was bold enough to say
I see evidence contrary to what we proposed
I imagine her flowing through these different worlds
 
at the center of the labyrinth letting go of separateness
is pain part of the armature, buttressed secret
unfolding star-wise can survive rooting through cracks
 
“Everything was moldering in this gorgeous way around you”
 
& then the milkflood flockspill genuflecting
 
I am tired of your guilt performance
 
Isn’t it tired too
 
clandestine antlered smell
wet clay and lilies
 
you oscillate through tenderness and occultation
parched curt iron-slammed wall
 
Kiss of death, the powerpoint
Description a way to evade my interior
 
ashamed I can’t speak in logical order
the napalm and the industrial potatoes
though I feel butterflies chime with lettuces
 
because I felt the whole register of my language
as a carapace humming betryal, steady casual hum
of machinery disavowing feeling
 
when words are shills
when my chest is full of pebbles
when my grief is wood
why tell anyone
 
a hurt a light an iron door an ocean
its thin edge and the dark plummet
of the open sky above it. Moon or not
Starless or bright prickle
 
Droplets hang from everything like bright holes
in a net endlessly replenished
 
Staunch versus sunder
 
Is soft the same as stupid